I called my father this morning shortly after waking up. He asked me what I was calling for and I had to confirm with him that he actually did not realize that today was Father's Day. I don't really like the man, but I'm at least going to wish him a happy Father's Day, even if I can't be around for it. Mind you, he forgets things like this a lot, but I'm at least glad I could say it.
No, that's a bald-faced lie, he's a pretty bad father.
For my stepdad, I'm paying off all of the money I owe him today. I can't say it's much of a gift, but it WILL make him happy. 
____________________
Three tomatoes are walking down the street -- a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. The baby tomato starts lagging behind, so the papa tomato takes a few steps back, squishes it, and says 'Ketchup!'. |