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05-03-22 06:08:18 PM
Jul - Craziness Domain - The Terrible Pun Thread New poll - New thread - New reply
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NinCollin

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Posted on 08-01-17 05:52:48 PM Link | Quote
I make puns all the time. Usually they are terrible.

#1
It was the case-adilla of the stolen Mexican food. The the thieves stole an enchi-lotta food. The police walked up to thief and said "That's nacho-cheese. It's between sesame and you now."

#2
What did the person say who didn't like Japanese food?


#3
What is a computer's favorite snack?


#4
Your friend has never seen a C64. You show them one, but play the worst game every released for it. Your friend now thinks that the C64 is terrible. You tell them "No, the C64 is actually pretty rad. Perhaps we got off on the wrong side."
(HAHA floppy disk/cassette tape joke)

#5
A local library has a small and cheap hotel in the back. You ask for a room, but the librarian says


#6
Where does a TV go on a vacation?


#7
What did the ottoman say to the sofa?


#8
I'm a natural at music puns, though most of them are flat. At least I have a sharp mind. On second thought, I'm musick of telling these puns. Let's band together and stop this madness!


I would put more, but can't remember any others.

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Elara
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Posted on 08-01-17 06:39:56 PM (last edited by Elara at 08-01-17 06:40:06 PM) Link | Quote

So, since you say these are all terrible, do you use them as a form of punishment?

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BatElite
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Posted on 08-09-17 11:14:19 AM Link | Quote
If we're not careful with this stuff, aliens might get angry and invade us punny Earthlings.

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sofi

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Posted on 08-09-17 08:24:39 PM Link | Quote
Nin★Colon

😉

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sofi

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NinCollin

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Posted on 08-09-17 11:59:34 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Sofi
Nin★Colon


That one made me want to explode. Nice job!
*Insert Nin★Collin seal of approval*

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Posted on 08-11-17 04:18:26 AM Link | Quote
How do you tell the sex of an ant? Throw it in water…

Sinks? Girl ant.
Floats? Buoyant.

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Orlandu


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Posted on 08-11-17 01:51:08 PM Link | Quote
When is it time to go to the dentist?



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sofi

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Posted on 08-15-17 06:56:30 AM Link | Quote
what do you call baked dough that is ill-suited for burger patties?

"The Terrible Bun Bread"

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Posted on 08-15-17 09:51:20 PM Link | Quote
What do you call a game made entirely out of cheese?

Cheess

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303darthbobby
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Posted on 08-16-17 06:27:16 PM Link | Quote
Mountains aren't just funny, they're hill-areas.

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BatElite
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Posted on 08-17-17 08:40:25 PM Link | Quote
When a fuck-up in a game's graphics leads to amusement it's



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NinCollin

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Posted on 08-21-17 01:37:25 AM Link | Quote
If I got a cat, I would name it Glenda, because I think that's a 9Pretty good name.

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Rick
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Posted on 08-25-17 02:55:12 AM Link | Quote
In Undertale, I know that many people find Sans' bone puns annoying.

I, on the other hand, find them to be quite humerus.

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BatElite
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Posted on 09-03-17 12:16:17 PM Link | Quote
After an intense session adjusting your energies you go to the to rest.


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Posted on 10-25-17 11:30:02 PM Link | Quote
Frisk: Papyrus, how many different kinds of pasta are there?
Papyrus: WELL, AS A MATTER OF FACT...
Sans: * heh, if i had a penne for every time i've asked myself that question.
Papyrus: SANS, YOU DID NOT JUST DO THAT.




Then there's this lame one about how the apple doesn't "farfalle" from the tree. That one's terrible.

I got this from a reddit post and put in the UnderTale context. I plan to make it an animated comic eventually, along with a few others.

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OPStellar

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Posted on 10-25-17 11:36:15 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Nin★Collin
If I got a cat, I would name it Glenda, because I think that's a 9Pretty good name.


I think you meant "right purrrrdy" name. :1

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OPStellar

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Posted on 11-13-17 06:15:17 PM Link | Quote
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Stew.
Stew who?
Stew early for jokes involving pots and puns.

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[If] I have made this letter longer than usual [it is] because I lack the time to make it shorter. – Blaise Pascal
BatElite
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Posted on 01-16-18 01:00:22 PM Link | Quote
Two more:

I've been a lung time fan of breathing.

A well-behaved skeleton is on the straight and marrow.

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Posted on 01-23-18 12:08:36 AM Link | Quote
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riking
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Posted on 01-24-18 09:48:33 PM Link | Quote

Hello, I figured my first post may as well be a terrible pun because that'll set your expectations.

Three cats are competing in a race.
there's an American cat named "one two three";
a German cat named "ein zwei drei";
and a French cat named "un deux trois".
the cats all swim across a lake. the American cat finishes first, the German cat finishes second, but the French cat is nowhere to be found. why?



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Jul - Craziness Domain - The Terrible Pun Thread New poll - New thread - New reply


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