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04-24-18 09:35:39 PM

Jul - News - Parents Hide Baby's Gender New poll - New thread - New reply
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Rick
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Posted on 05-24-11 07:49:12 PM (last edited by Rick at 05-24-11 07:49 PM) Link | Quote
The Article For you!

The parents have some interesting viewpoints and arguments, so...what do you think about them?
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Posted on 05-24-11 08:08:48 PM Link | Quote
I thought that it was quite an... interesting viewpoint. One thing a bit to the side that I disagree with is the "unschooled" schooling that they are getting. If we just learned what was fun, then there are a lot of lessons that we will not learn. It's through the tedious task of learning about all-topics that we mature. About the gender, I think it is important for a child to know their gender and grow up with that identity and then once they are older decide what gender they would like. As for the Jazz's gender issues, that's silly, seeing as he is only five years old. Five year olds can't make much decisions for themselves. It's the parents responsibility to make those decisions for them until they get to a point where they can decide for themselves.
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Posted on 05-24-11 08:28:03 PM Link | Quote
I really don't think that being made to confront gender issues is something that 5- and 2-year old children should have to deal with, much less a newborn.

Conforming to stereotypical gender roles shouldn't be a necessary part of anyone's life, but deliberately steering your three children away from a nominally "normal" life from the day they're born because of some facet of society that you perceive as "tyrannical" isn't exactly better. It's rather hypocritical to proclaim that you're doing this as "a tribute to freedom" when this sort of thing is hardly the parents' choice to make in the first place.

Between this and the completely idiotic "unschooling" thing, this just sounds like two parents trying to create the three most poorly-adjusted people on the planet.
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Posted on 05-24-11 08:30:28 PM Link | Quote
Well, remember that someone's gender does not always match with their genitals I think that pushing a genital-based gender role too hard (like my dad did) just reduces one's self-expression, strengthens gender stereotypes, and makes your child's life a living hell if they turn out to be trans. I think that children should be given more choice as a kid, although they should at least be told their birth sex.
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Posted on 05-24-11 08:38:35 PM Link | Quote
Hm... I mean, this whole hiding the birth gender thing really does have the thought of a publicity stunt, I mean, you can do that when they've just been born and are just telling people but I mean, it's going to come out soon enough...

And the "unschooling" concept seems a bit dubious, and would seem to have the risk of depriving the children of socialization outside of the parent's chosen circle, which could be problematic for their development. (Though I'm not a child psychologist or anything so what do I know)

But I don't necessarily think the idea of raising a child without trying to push the societal view of gender is a bad thing, either...
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Posted on 05-24-11 08:46:43 PM Link | Quote
The "unschooling" thing isn't so bad once you realize that the oldest child is five years old.

However, the article is unclear on whether or not this is intended to go much further, so there's room for doubt.
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Posted on 05-25-11 12:15:05 AM Link | Quote
While I don't think a gender should be forced on someone, parents should make an effort to have their kids fit in and function in society, at least from the beginning. It seems the mother is just pushing some feminist agenda on her children, which is completely wrong. Your kid's development should never be screwed up by some political agenda like that. Give them the options on what they want without forcing certain things but lean them in the direction that will make them successful members of society. Also, there are a lot more variables that will affect their choices, like which gender they spend more time with. If the mother was with them most for a long time, they may consider female to be most familiar, or she might provide some push towards them to be her preferred gender, if that's female.

Damn hippie parents. :/
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Posted on 05-25-11 01:10:26 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by The Red Snifit
The "unschooling" thing isn't so bad once you realize that the oldest child is five years old.

However, the article is unclear on whether or not this is intended to go much further, so there's room for doubt.

Actually, you're right - it actually doesn't seem like that bad of an idea for children who are too young to attend grade school.

Unfortunately I don't think it's going to stop there for those kids.
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Posted on 05-25-11 06:54:21 AM (last edited by Girlydragon at 05-25-11 06:54 AM) Link | Quote
The unschooling part is pure stupid and I hope they don't continue with it for long.

And frankly, a newborn doesn't have the mental capacity to really take advantage of being gender-neutral, and will probably not fit into society.

Sure, I like that we are moving towards more gender-neutral society, but let's not overdo it, there's a reason that the two genders have differences, and let's use that too the best effect.
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Posted on 05-25-11 08:25:39 AM Link | Quote
A child will act how they want to act whether or not they know their own gender. Hiding it from the child will just cause unneccesary confusion later on when he/she is exposed to normal children. If he's a boy, tell the kid he's a boy. Don't want him to automatically conform to typical boy activities? Don't buy him exclusively boy-oriented toys and don't discourage him to do non-boyish things.


There is a little something to their philosophy that parents make too many choices for their kids. Most parents probably push traditional gender roles for their kids, which isn't necessarily wrong but not the best thing to do. But for other things? Do they really think their kids will make wise decisions when it comes to educating themselves? Or when it comes to keeping themselves healthy? Of course not.
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Posted on 05-25-11 02:21:09 PM Link | Quote
I'm sorry, but frankly these parents are fucking insane.

I fully agree that a person's gender doesn't necessarily match their genitals, but this is just going to make things awfully confusing for the poor kid down the road. These parents are forcing an agenda on a fucking baby, and that's just reprehensible to me.

And while I can understand the whole "unschooling" thing to an extent, especially with young children, there are still things kids need to know. Say, for instance, that an unschooled child has no interest in math--where should we expect them to learn basic arithmetic? Same goes for reading, writing, and so on.

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Posted on 05-25-11 02:59:25 PM (last edited by Lady Crabbyboss at 05-25-11 03:02 PM) Link | Quote
I think unschooling is better for a child before they're in school instead of forcing the ABC's down their throat before they go to kindergarten. My brother and I were "taught" this way, and while he was busy doodling I was writing my full name and could count from 1-30 and do addition and subtraction. This was before I was in preschool, and my brother is a year older than I am. Needless to say, I have helped him countless times with spelling and math homework but I was always too lazy to do my own...

As far as the gender identity is concerned? It would be amazing if everybody were brought up like this, though that's hardly the case. I guess we'll see how this pans out as the children get older.
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Posted on 05-25-11 03:49:12 PM Link | Quote
It's a highly interesting proposition and it seems like it could work out for the best.

But when the kid doesn't like people questioning his gender, then I think that's the point where you should stop. Or at least confirm the gender.
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Posted on 05-25-11 04:24:38 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Lady Crabbyboss
It would be amazing if everybody were brought up like this
That's exactly the problem: nobody else does it.

In a future society this would probably work.
Right now though it gives a mess of implications and consequences and other problems that shouldn't really happen but do happen because the current society is a mess.

So while they have good ideals... In practice it just means a lot of other things. Though given their older son's reactions to it all, it all seems fine anyways.

On the other hand, this very example could just be an scheme to use their kids in a fight they don't have any business in. There's a line there that must be drawn, and given the older son again seems to have already choosen against the idea, that should be respected because that's the whole point of it in paper.
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Posted on 05-30-11 08:48:55 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Auxiliatrix
I'm sorry, but frankly these parents are fucking insane.

I fully agree that a person's gender doesn't necessarily match their genitals, but this is just going to make things awfully confusing for the poor kid down the road. These parents are forcing an agenda on a fucking baby, and that's just reprehensible to me.

And while I can understand the whole "unschooling" thing to an extent, especially with young children, there are still things kids need to know. Say, for instance, that an unschooled child has no interest in math--where should we expect them to learn basic arithmetic? Same goes for reading, writing, and so on.



This. I cannot stand all these "progressive" parents popping up with these half-baked concepts. I could care less if a person's gender doesn't match their genitals, these kids haven't even reached puberty--to imply that children as young as this could have any solid grasp on gender identity is nothing short of bananas. The only thing this is doing is setting the kids up to be way more confused once they do reach the ages of sexual maturity. Its likely they are creating gender identity problems for these kids when they otherwise may not have even had them. I'm also tired these "ultra-modern" parents giving their kids stupid non-names. If I named my children Tree, Laser and Frappaccino, that's not trendy, it's idiotic.

as for the unschooling thing, I can see how that may be beneficial from the preschool-kindergarten level, but like others have said it likely won't stop there for these kids. I won't make assumptions though.
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Posted on 05-30-11 10:30:23 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by Keitaro
I'm also tired these "ultra-modern" parents giving their kids stupid non-names. If I named my children Tree, Laser and Frappaccino, that's not trendy, it's idiotic.

In their defense, I've actually heard far worse names than Storm, Jazz, and Kio in this department. At least those kind of sound like they could be actual names. Heck I'd prefer those to names like Mercedes, Lexus, and Diamond which are far more common but still stupid. Heck I might even prefer them to the latest "Hayden, Aiden, Jayden, ect" trend. But yeah, in general these wacky unconventional names piss me off to like "apple" or "@". I mean why don't they just name the kid "kick my ass"?
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Posted on 05-30-11 10:31:24 AM Link | Quote
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Posted on 05-30-11 11:22:14 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by BlackNemesis13
Originally posted by Keitaro
I'm also tired these "ultra-modern" parents giving their kids stupid non-names. If I named my children Tree, Laser and Frappaccino, that's not trendy, it's idiotic.

In their defense, I've actually heard far worse names than Storm, Jazz, and Kio in this department. At least those kind of sound like they could be actual names. Heck I'd prefer those to names like Mercedes, Lexus, and Diamond which are far more common but still stupid. Heck I might even prefer them to the latest "Hayden, Aiden, Jayden, ect" trend. But yeah, in general these wacky unconventional names piss me off to like "apple" or "@". I mean why don't they just name the kid "kick my ass"?


The modern name I really don't like is Nevaeh. I mean, it's heaven spelled backwards, for gosh sakes, invented about 10 years ago by a member of a Christian rock band.

Also, girls' names that start with "Mc", which is a Gaelic prefix meaning "son of". Not to mention they sound like meals from McDonald's.
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Posted on 05-30-11 02:24:47 PM Link | Quote
Originally posted by BlackNemesis13
Originally posted by Keitaro
I'm also tired these "ultra-modern" parents giving their kids stupid non-names. If I named my children Tree, Laser and Frappaccino, that's not trendy, it's idiotic.

In their defense, I've actually heard far worse names than Storm, Jazz, and Kio in this department. At least those kind of sound like they could be actual names. Heck I'd prefer those to names like Mercedes, Lexus, and Diamond which are far more common but still stupid. Heck I might even prefer them to the latest "Hayden, Aiden, Jayden, ect" trend. But yeah, in general these wacky unconventional names piss me off to like "apple" or "@". I mean why don't they just name the kid "kick my ass"?

Yeah, those aren't even really that bad, it just reminded me of stuff like yeah, fucking APPLE.
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Posted on 05-31-11 03:46:30 AM Link | Quote
Originally posted by BlackNemesis13
Heck I'd prefer those to names like Mercedes, Lexus, and Diamond which are far more common but still stupid.

In the bolded case, the name came long before the car, and in fact the car was named for a person.

I'm with you on the others, and especially Nevaeh. Fuck that name annoys me.
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Jul - News - Parents Hide Baby's Gender New poll - New thread - New reply




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