I'm working on converting all of this into a (very) loose form of iambic pentameter because I have nothing better to do.
moron, approaching xkeeper from behind: Dialga hath been banished. Must this be for ever?
xk: Right you are, my lad.
[XKEEPER TURNS, PAUSES FOR A MOMENT IN SURPRISE]
xk: Zounds, 'tis you once more! I had been of the mind that we would not be speaking hence. It has been a score and seven times we have spoken, despite your bland assurance to the contrary.
moron: Dialga has sworn to ne'er return. Quoth he: "Jul is given to lunacy and vexation." Perhaps you know of a Bitmap? At every turn he flouts the law, but he retains his power. Is this how you lead? If this city was mine, he'd surely have hanged from the gibbet. And the man known as CPU, with his abnormal facade: is he man or child? And I'd never broken contact, surely I'd have stated so.
xk: You amuse me, sir. Lunacy, you say? It must be lunacy that hath prevented thee from sending a private message. As for Bitmap, you see, he is well within the law. Perhaps you've not heard it, but in the forums he's visited, the laws are relaxed. Postcounts R Us is one of these venues; its purpose is obvious, but apparently beneath you! And like your dear Dialga, you have also been banned, so your opinion is useless, you pitiful worm. Your insults are stale, you called CPU a child? You sound like an impudent schoolboy, you mouldering fool. In addition to this, you've said many times that our contact was severed, I remember quite well.
moron: When I was that mushroom, you gave me free reign. But you expelled me, before I was ever unmasked. I did nothing different than Bitmap. As for the colors, I bet you've done a quick hack. I myself am not so unskilled as that. And I shall cease to speak with you, as it only seems to stoke the flames of the people's foolishness.
xk: You are free to converse, however idiotic. The colors are for the renowned and are competently applied; your feeble mind comprehends not how this is done. Your accusations of drunkenness are pointless and stupid. It is amusing that you attempt to rewrite the laws, while your understanding of them is weak indeed. Perhaps this is why you are in exile. You deny reregging to speak of the NSMB, but it is obvious, you see, that you enjoy it immensely.
moron: My judgment of thee and thine is too verbose at this time. I've given it in short, for that is quite quick. And stop mentioning our past, as that matters not.
xk: Your opinion is clear, from our past conversations; your judgment of me has mattered no more each time. Come, you swine, I'm ready for more. You say to disregard our past, as if we'd never spoken, which makes little sense. Your antics would still amuse me, if they numbered five score. I cannot believe that you fancy a game, I've been around many years and heard nothing so lame.
[insert more here later]
Need more material. :/
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