Jul -- General Chat: JUL 378

JDavis

Level: 22

Posts: 34/82
EXP: 51471
For next: 6879

Since: 03-07-09

From: Ada, OK, USA

Since last post: 12.1 years
Last activity: 10.7 years

Posted on 04-05-09 03:32:31 AM (last edited by JDavis at 04-05-09 12:34 AM)

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JDavis runs into the room, having overslept by half an hour, grabs the test, and quickly starts writing down answers

University of Jul
College of Derpa
Spokane, Washington

NAME: WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK I AM!? (JDavis)
DATE: _____________________

JDavis glances at his watch. It is broken.

DATE: ________Today________
SECTION: _____Oldbies______

Instructions: Answer each question as clearly as possible and show all your work. Same as the last time, if you don't know the answer, make stuff up. Good luck!

I. Biology (Mixed answer, 24 points)

1. If milk comes from cows, does butter come from butterflies? (4)

"No. Butter comes from tubs."

2. Describe the reproductive system of an eyestalk. (6)

JDavis scatches his head for a second, but decides he doesn't have time to really think this through.

"Boys have a penis. Girls have a vagina."

3. Of the following, which is at the top of the food chain? Explain your answer. (6)

Lion
Snake
Tiger
Kyle Ward
Godzilla
Chris Hansen

"Snake. Snake? SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE!!!"

4. A cultive of bacteria starts out at 300 cells. If the population after three hours is 9001 cells, and doubles every three hours, how fast are they reproducing and how long do we have until they mutate into a strain of super-flu that will infect all of mankind and destroy civilization as we know it? (8)

"Over nine thousand. At least a hundred years."

II. Computer Science III (Short answer, 30 points)

1. According to security expert Mike Sandy, how many proxies do you need to be behind in order to avoid detection? (6)

"Zero."

2. union("FALCON PAWNCH!", 0, inf) = ? (6)

"Hands off my bread"

3. What does the following code do? (6)

#include <stdio.h>

#include <stdlib.h>



int main()

   {

      int i;

      bool moron;

      char *username[1000];



      for (i=0; i<1000; i++)

         {

            if (username[i] == moron || username[i] == "Mega-Mario")

               {

                  username[i] == 'NULL';

                  terminate;

               }

         }



      return 0;

    }

"Nothing"

4. Which of the following items are Turing-complete? Justify your answer. (6)

-Sticks and stones
-LBP
-An abacus
-George W. Bush

"Navuh fussavenint... ABACUS!"

5. Given a string of length 32 over an alphabet A of cardinality 256, and the cipher 8x + 4 mod 32, how many collisions will occur before the rescue teams arrive on the scene? (6)

"1186"

____________________

Kirbynite

Level: 57

Posts: 163/755
EXP: 1474335
For next: 11593

Since: 07-05-08

Since last post: 9.6 years
Last activity: 9.1 years

Posted on 04-05-09 05:14:59 AM (last edited by Kirbynite at 04-05-09 02:16 AM)

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"Hm.."

The ghost that ate Kirbynite's term paper was still lingering around.

He may not know the ghost and certain others personally, but he knew something about them. And he knew that this ghost was not supposed to be this big.

"Let's see if my hypothesis is correct..."

*KLUNK!*

Kirbynite: Er..

Yuyuko: Oh my.

Kirbynite: Sorry.

Yuyuko: What's going on..? The last thing I remember was eating a mushroom..

Kirbynite: I guess I was right in thinking it was a Super Mushroom.

Uh.. Er.. Miss.... Sai...gyouji.

Kirbynite sheepishly walked towards the now normal sized ghost, who was sitting close to the edge of the broken wall.

Kirbynite: Why don't you have a seat over there.

Kirbynite points at an empty chair.

Yuyuko: Where am I..? Oh my.. is this a classroom? Was this all a dream? Was I actually a schoolgirl having a long dream during a nerve racking exam?

Kirbynite quickly looks away with a slightly contorted look on his face.

Kirbynite: How would she even know what a modern classroom looks like?

He looked back.

Kirbynite: Er, no, Miss, I believe you simply had a bout with the fourth wall. Don't worry about it.

The ghost slowly floated over to the empty chair.

Yuyuko: Oh my. I hope the wall knows I meant no harm. I think.

Kirbynite: .. Yeah, I'm sure the wall's had better days but it'll understand.

;

____________________

Tyty

Level: 165

Posts: 1372/8599
EXP: 58676718
For next: 258963

Since: 07-07-07

Since last post: 9.8 years
Last activity: 9.8 years

Posted on 04-05-09 05:27:17 AM

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The black white witch stumbling away from the angry Reimu was stuttering...

"Re-re-relax Reimu, I don't even know why I'm here. I was just reading some books I stole from Patchy, and..."

She fell over the desk behind her

"Ow, ze... Hmm? Why is my name on this test!?"

____________________

DigitalBasic
Pancakes!
Level: 174

Posts: 5066/9712
EXP: 70453941
For next: 443926

Since: 07-03-07

Pronouns: they/them

Since last post: 76 days
Last activity: 3 days

Posted on 04-05-09 05:38:22 AM

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William: ...Cirno Racing came a bit early, didn't it?

____________________

Tyty

Level: 165

Posts: 1375/8599
EXP: 58676718
For next: 258963

Since: 07-07-07

Since last post: 9.8 years
Last activity: 9.8 years

Posted on 04-05-09 05:41:47 AM

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With the whole classroom distracted by the ordeal, Tewi walked back in the front door, finishing her tripwire trap, and started back to her desk

Tewi: "What the Hell Marisa, are you trying to steal my answers!? Get your own worksheet! Hey! You even erased my name and put yours on here!"

She glanced at the teacher

Tewi: "Sorry, I had to use the bathroom"

Marisa could only sit there, jaw dangling

____________________

Cirvante
1340

Feel the wrath of eternal damnation please! I would appreciate that very much thank you!
Level: 74

Posts: 699/1342
EXP: 3616623
For next: 36921

Since: 07-10-07

Since last post: 8.4 years
Last activity: 6 days

Posted on 04-05-09 11:35:21 PM

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Cirvante sighed. "I'm surrounded by lunatics..." ____________________ board2 - Jul - OC ReMix

Sukasa

Level: 123

Posts: 808/4326
EXP: 20936862
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Since: 07-07-07

Since last post: 1.1 years
Last activity: 1.1 years

Posted on 04-05-09 11:39:39 PM

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Sukasa - Send Private Message

Walking up to the professor's desk, Sukasa turned in his exam.

"You're not the only one"

____________________

ReiNi
さよなら＊へヴン
Level: 124

Posts: 1572/4444
EXP: 21770396
For next: 66205

Since: 07-21-07

Since last post: 6.7 years
Last activity: 3.3 years

Posted on 04-05-09 11:53:51 PM

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Every of us has a ⑨ inside.
---------------------------- *Reimu sets Tewi's face AND exam spontaneouly on fire*
This all is your doing, somehow. Yukari, Yuyuko, Marisa... -- Stop bringing me bad luck.

*Sighs and goes back to drinking tea on her desk, ignoring the rest of the madness*

____________________

Tyty

Level: 165

Posts: 1430/8599
EXP: 58676718
For next: 258963

Since: 07-07-07

Since last post: 9.8 years
Last activity: 9.8 years

Posted on 04-06-09 12:12:09 AM (last edited by Tewi at 04-05-09 09:19 PM)

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The rabbit fell over, twitching

Marisa: "... well, maybe I'll try my hand at the test, ze."

_______________________________________

University of Jul
College of Derpa
Spokane, Washington

NAME: Marisa Kirisame________
DATE: 05 卯月 Year 124__________
SECTION: Love Magic________

Instructions: Answer each question as clearly as possible and show all your work. Same as the last time, if you don't know the answer, make stuff up. Good luck!

I. Biology (Mixed answer, 24 points)

1. If milk comes from cows, does butter come from butterflies? (4)

Of course not! If they did, Yuyuko wouldn't have to send Youmu out to get butter.

2. Describe the reproductive system of an eyestalk. (6)

I read in this one book in the SDM library that eyestalks are only one piece of the larger tentacle monster. Everyone should know how those reproduce, ze.

3. Of the following, which is at the top of the food chain? Explain your answer. (6)

Lion
Snake
Tiger
Kyle Ward
Godzilla
Chris Hansen

The Lion. There are no Godzillas in Gensokyo. People in the outside world must still believe in them I guess.

4. A cultive of bacteria starts out at 300 cells. If the population after three hours is 9001 cells, and doubles every three hours, how fast are they reproducing and how long do we have until they mutate into a strain of super-flu that will infect all of mankind and destroy civilization as we know it? (8)

They won't make it past my Master Spark.

II. Computer Science III (Short answer, 30 points)

1. According to security expert Mike Sandy, how many proxies do you need to be behind in order to avoid detection? (6)

What the Hell is a proxy?

2. union("FALCON PAWNCH!", 0, inf) = ? (6)

union? Falcon Punch? This makes no sense ze.

3. What does the following code do? (6)



#include <stdio.h>

#include <stdlib.h>



int main()

   {

      int i;

      bool moron;

      char *username[1000];



      for (i=0; i<1000; i++)

         {

            if (username[i] == moron || username[i] == "Mega-Mario")

               {

                  username[i] == 'NULL';

                  terminate;

               }

         }



      return 0;

    }

....

4. Which of the following items are Turing-complete? Justify your answer. (6)

-Sticks and stones
-LBP
-An abacus
-George W. Bush

An abacus. Those beads are complex, ze.

5. Given a string of length 32 over an alphabet A of cardinality 256, and the cipher 8x + 4 mod 32, how many collisions will occur before the rescue teams arrive on the scene? (6)

.......... 4?

____________________________________________________

Getting up, Marisa handed in her test, and sat back down in her desk.

____________________

DigitalBasic
Pancakes!
Level: 174

Posts: 5072/9712
EXP: 70453941
For next: 443926

Since: 07-03-07

Pronouns: they/them

Since last post: 76 days
Last activity: 3 days

Posted on 04-06-09 04:23:55 PM

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William: Cirv...

William shook his head.

William: You are just realizing that?

____________________

Raspberry
Thank you for my time here. I won't ever forget..
Level: 85

Posts: 938/1823
EXP: 5727209
For next: 171331

Since: 07-07-07

Pronouns: she/her

Since last post: 1.0 years
Last activity: 78 days

Posted on 04-07-09 09:54:25 PM

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Ninetales: "So there's more to the test, professor? When will we be able to start on it?"

Feeling the first tugs of boredom, Ninetales pulled out some paper and began to scribble some notes about something-or-other on it.

Ninetales: (Might as well keep busy with something while I'm waiting... I never have any time to work on this any other time... :\)

____________________
~Rin Kaenbyou

Giga

Level: 41

Posts: 239/346
EXP: 452441
For next: 27704

Since: 10-21-08

From: Wood Zone

Since last post: 5.4 years
Last activity: 4.1 years

Posted on 04-11-09 01:19:19 PM

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* Giga walks into the room, completely oblivious to everyone else. He grabs a blank test and a pen off the front desk, and goes to one of the walls that isn't destroyed to write on.

University of Jul
College of Derpa
Spokane, Washington

NAME: Giga "The Echidna" Otomia
DATE: Since when did time matter?
SECTION: Wood Zone________

Instructions: Answer each question as clearly as possible and show all your work. Same as the last time, if you don't know the answer, make stuff up. Good luck!

I. Biology (Mixed answer, 24 points)

1. If milk comes from cows, does butter come from butterflies? (4)
Of course not. Butter is made from the cream in milk, if I'm not mistaken.

2. Describe the reproductive system of an eyestalk. (6)
*insert the reproductive system of the organism the eyestalk is attached to*

3. Of the following, which is at the top of the food chain? Explain your answer. (6)

Lion
Snake
Tiger
Kyle Ward
Godzilla
Chris Hansen
I say Snake, since he's just about fucking invincible to all forms of attack. Godzilla is a close second due to being about three stories tall and a shit ton stronger than any other specie on that list.

4. A cultive of bacteria starts out at 300 cells. If the population after three hours is 9001 cells, and doubles every three hours, how fast are they reproducing and how long do we have until they mutate into a strain of super-flu that will infect all of mankind and destroy civilization as we know it? (8)
"Huh. That's 8701 cells for the first three hours, and 9001 cells for the second..."
r=h*9001+300 where r is the reproduction rate, and h is the number of hours past. We would have a few days at least until it turns into some super flu.

II. Computer Science III (Short answer, 30 points)

1. According to security expert Mike Sandy, how many proxies do you need to be behind in order to avoid detection? (6)
Just one.

2. union("FALCON PAWNCH!", 0, inf) = ? (6)
Infinity.

3. What does the following code do? (6)

#include <stdio.h>

#include <stdlib.h>



int main()

   {

      int i;

      bool moron;

      char *username[1000];



      for (i=0; i<1000; i++)

         {

            if (username[i] == moron || username[i] == "Mega-Mario")

               {

                  username[i] == 'NULL';

                  terminate;

               }

         }



      return 0;

    }

What the code does is it looks for the username "moron" and replaces it with "Mega-Mario".

4. Which of the following items are Turing-complete? Justify your answer. (6)

-Sticks and stones
-LBP
-An abacus
-George W. Bush
All of them, since they all have a physical presence.

5. Given a string of length 32 over an alphabet A of cardinality 256, and the cipher 8x + 4 mod 32, how many collisions will occur before the rescue teams arrive on the scene? (6)
Considering there is no scene for rescue teams to arrive on, nor is there a rescue team being called, all of them.

* Giga takes a step away from the wall and looks at his work. He decides it's good enough and hands in the test, then goes back to stand against the wall. It looks like he fiddles with an invisible keyboard and mouse, and he starts bobbing his head in rhythm to something. A physically present ZSNES window pops up, and Giga starts playing The Lost Vikings 2 on it.

____________________

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