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09-23-18 11:34:36 PM

Jul - Display Case - The Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss New poll - New thread - Thread closed
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Dragon Fogel
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Posted on 03-23-11 01:02:19 AM Link
You are Nopor Puss, the Master of Pointlessness. You constantly strive to do the most pointless thing you can think of.

For no reason whatsoever, you have decided to go on a quest for the Inflatable Amulet of Pomposity. Naturally, you will undertake this quest in the most pointless way that you can.

You are in an ancient temple. The Inflatable Amulet of Pomposity is sitting on a pedestal in front of you. What will you do?

----

Hello, YK dragged me here to start this thing. This is a text adventure. What you guys will do is post a command, any command at all, and I will write up the results of that command in my next post.

However, because Nopor Puss is the most pointless person in the world, he will only do pointless things. Bear this in mind when submitting your commands. In other words, make them thoroughly impractical and inapplicable; that's what makes this fun.

You can make more than one command at once; however, I may skip commands if I feel I have too damn many of them or I just plain don't want to write anything for one of them. That's not too likely to happen, just be aware that I might not use your command in the next update. (Also there is a good chance I will deliberately misinterpret your command. That's part of the fun!)

You win when Nopor Puss gets the Inflatable Amulet of Pomposity. Assuming he doesn't come up with some pointless reason why getting it doesn't count.

Is that confusing? Don't worry, you'll get the hang of it soon enough once people start making commands.
YK

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At some point you just have to cease and de-racist.

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Posted on 03-23-11 01:03:11 AM Link
Dance a happy little jig in front of the amulet.
Taryn
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Posted on 03-23-11 01:08:26 AM Link
Jump up and down repeatedly.
Dragon Fogel
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Posted on 03-23-11 01:29:45 AM Link
Originally posted by YK
Dance a happy little jig in front of the amulet.


You dance a happy little jig in front of the amulet. It doesn't seem to be entertained by your display at all. Excellent!

Originally posted by Terra
Jump up and down repeatedly.


You jump up and down repeatedly. So many times, in fact, that you wear away at the floor beneath your feet and fall through the resulting hole.

You are now in the lower depths of the temple. There is a lever nearby that says "RELEASE BOULDER TRAP". What will you do?
Taryn
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Posted on 03-23-11 01:30:55 AM Link
Try to eat the lever.
YK

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Posted on 03-23-11 01:32:36 AM Link
Carefully and tediously disarm the trap, then find a way to spring it anyhow.
Arp1033
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Posted on 03-23-11 02:47:46 AM Link
Try to teach the lever how to be a switch.
Dragon Fogel
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Posted on 03-23-11 02:30:14 PM Link
Originally posted by Terra
Try to eat the lever.


You attempt to eat the lever. In doing so, you accidentally press it. A panel opens, but no boulder comes out because you already triggered this trap last week.

Originally posted by YK
Carefully and tediously disarm the trap, then find a way to spring it anyhow.


Since the trap has already been disarmed, disarming it again is pointless. You proceed with the task immediately!

With extreme caution, you disable the mechanisms, being sure that you don't accidentally release the boulder that isn't there. Finally, the task is done. Now you just need to spring the trap despite your careful preparations.

You go over to the doorway that the boulder crashed into last week and carefully start rolling the boulder backwards along the track (which is very difficult and pointlessly dangerous) until you get it back into place, without damaging the delicate systems you put in to keep the trap from working.

Then you pick up a small stick you tied to a string. The string activates a complicated mechanism that triggers the trap and sends the boulder rolling after you. How will you escape this trap?

Originally posted by Arp1033
Try to teach the lever how to be a switch.


Ignoring the rapidly-approaching boulder, you begin teaching the lever how to be a switch. You do this by demonstrating the procedure yourself, and turn yourself off. You'd try to turn yourself on again, but you need to be on in order to do anything!

As a result, you stand perfectly still. Unfortunately, you were standing outside of the boulder's path and it misses you, rolling along and blocking the doorway it was originally blocking.

What will you do now?
YK

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Posted on 03-23-11 02:58:31 PM Link
Celebrate the Chinese New Year.
Sunny

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Posted on 03-23-11 03:03:51 PM Link
Assist command: Give moral support to the boulder
(possibly encourage it back up the slope?)
Nicole

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Posted on 03-23-11 03:04:58 PM Link
Check my schedule and make sure I'm not missing anything important.
Lunaria

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Posted on 03-23-11 03:20:54 PM (last edited by Karis at 03-23-11 03:21 PM) Link
Have a cake party with the rolling boulder.
Taryn
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Posted on 03-23-11 03:24:56 PM Link
Turn into an octopus.
Xenesis
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Posted on 03-23-11 11:53:23 PM Link
>Invert the colour spectrum
YK

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Posted on 03-24-11 12:21:38 AM Link
Propose marriage to the boulder.
Dragon Fogel
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Posted on 03-24-11 01:56:46 AM Link
Originally posted by YK
Celebrate the Chinese New Year.


Excellent idea! You decide to celebrate by continuing to stand perfectly still, because you're pretty sure that's not the appropriate way to celebrate Chinese New Year and therefore it's pointless to celebrate that way.

Originally posted by MM200
Assist command: Give moral support to the boulder
(possibly encourage it back up the slope?)


You give moral support to the boulder by continuing to stand perfectly still. You're certain this won't be an effective way to provide moral support.

Originally posted by Imajin
Check my schedule and make sure I'm not missing anything important.


You mentally check your schedule. You're not missing anything important right now because you scheduled everything important for tomorrow. At the same time. When you're sure you won't be able to make it to anything.

Sounds like your schedule is just how you want it to be!

Originally posted by Karis
Have a cake party with the rolling boulder.


You don't have a cake. Perfect! You have a cake party which very pointedly does not celebrate the Chinese New Year and does not provide moral support to the boulder, and you do so without a cake, and also by staying perfectly still. You're really getting the hang of this.

Originally posted by Terra
Turn into an octopus.


You turn the switch you're acting as from OFF to INTO AN OCTOPUS. Your state is now INTO AN OCTOPUS. You begin walking towards the nearest octopus so you can go into it, which means you walk around with no particular direction because you have no idea where the nearest octopus is.

Originally posted by Xenesis
>Invert the colour spectrum


You invert the color spectrum. Anything that is spectrum-colored is now inverted. Since nothing you can see is spectrum-colored, this has no apparent effect.

Originally posted by YK
Propose marriage to the boulder.


You propose marriage to the boulder. It doesn't reply. It must be thinking the question over! How can you help it make up its mind?
Xenesis
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Posted on 03-24-11 01:59:49 AM Link
>Develop cold fusion technology
YK

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Posted on 03-24-11 02:04:17 AM Link
Play football.
Xenesis
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Posted on 03-24-11 02:08:49 AM Link
>Retcon "The Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss" so that Han shot first.
Arp1033
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Posted on 03-24-11 03:55:32 AM Link
Try to call your cell phone with your cell phone.
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Jul - Display Case - The Pointless Adventures of Nopor Puss New poll - New thread - Thread closed




Rusted Logic

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